FamilyInShape

The power of a positive attitude

Photo by SpinDiva "Sunset on the Sound, OBX 2009"

You ever find yourself surrounded by negative people? 

At work.

At the grocery store.

At the gym.

Sometimes, even at home.

Yes.  We all face them and sometimes we just follow suit and fall into that negative rut that plagues so many.  

I'm a big believer in living as an optimist (with realism not to far behind).  I have asked the pessimists in my life why they always thing the worst of things or the worst  case scenario?  They respond with "this way I'm prepared for the worst and if something good happens then I'll be surprised." 

WOW.  That response has stuck with me because it is amazing that anyone can think like that.  I see their point though.  They are trying to avoid feeling disappointed.  But, what's wrong with a little disappointment?   Aren't those the hurdles we must strive to jump every once in a while?  

As an optimist I say everything will workout as it should or today is going to be a great day, regardless of how it started and it usually turns out that way.  I find myself smiling more, getting less stressed over traffic issues, silly people, etc.  However, when things don't workout, even after I've worked myself up to thinking they will, I use those moments as challenges to make things better.

There's a theory about stress first identified by Dr. Susan Kobasa (1979) called the Hardiness Theory of Stress. The theory has three basic principles: Commitment, Control and Challenge, also known as the three C's.  Possessing the three C's makes one hardy.

One who is hardy  will be committed to what they are doing, act as if they can control the outcome regardless of the changes, and use the change as a challenge to improve their life. Those people are considered hardy and have been known to #1 manage stress better then most, #2 avoid the health effects of stress, #3 live a happier life.

"When I go to bed at night I already know how my day is going to be the next day.  However, I have been known to oversleep, forget to turn on the alarm, the kids sleep right through their alarm, and I forgot to pack lunches the night before, etc.  OK so things have taken a turn and my plan to have a great day has been challenged.  Am I hardy enough to deal with this mess?

I'd like to think I am, most of the time.  I commit myself to what I know I can and must do NOW (get everyone up and ready to go).  I control the outcome of this event (everyone will get to school, eventually- it's not the end of the world). I use the challenges and be better prepared next time (pack lunches the night before, go to bed at a reasonable time).

No screaming, no anger, no fights.  Just taking the time to do what needs to be done because no matter what I do, I can't turn back time.  I can only work towards making this day a great day, regardless of the setbacks.

A few quotes to get you thinking:

“A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.”

~ Winston Churchill “To love what you do and feel that it matters how could anything be more fun?” ~ Katherine Graham “When you put faith, hope and love together, you can raise positive kids in a negative world.” ~ Zig Ziglar My favorite is one I used to sing to the kids on the way to school -  So let the sunshine in Face it with a grin Smilers never loose and frowners never win So let the sunshine in Face it with a grin Open up your heart and let the sunshine in! Stay Well,

Mental health

This week's focus is on exercising your mind.  Too many times we get caught up in the daily to-do's and when we do take time to rest we end up thinking about what we could be doing or what we plan to do later or what we could have done.  Instead of wasting your precious quiet time on those mindless worries, why not feed your mind by feeding it, nourishing your thoughts with mind games, reading, puzzles and the like.  Check out these ideas and maybe share some of your own ideas: 

Exercise your mind:  an article on CNN.com states that, "Just as physical activity keeps your body strong, mental activity keeps your mind sharp and agile. One way to do this is to continually challenge yourself by learning new skills. If you continue to learn and challenge yourself, your brain continues to grow, literally. An active brain produces new connections between nerve cells that allow cells to communicate with one another. This helps your brain store and retrieve information more easily, no matter what your age." With news like this, what have we got to loose, except our minds.

Read: Mike on livelife365 says, "Anything that occupies your mind differently, works another part of the old gray matter, is beneficial. Reading is great for you. Toss out that TV and read, every day. Fiction, non-fiction, magazines, newspapers, ahh, blogs? Yes, those too. Expand your knowledge, learn new things--you will enhance your life now, and really help yourself as you age."  Keep a book in the car to help you kill time while waiting for your kids at the baseball field (or wherever they may be), keep one by your bedside table, replace your remote with a book every now and then.  So pick up a book, keep it handy and read a page, read a chapter when you can and throw your mind into a story or a learning  activity that will take you away from your daily tasks.

Puzzles: Tarun from Paranoid Escapes suggests "A few ways to exercise your mind is to do some crossword puzzles, or play common games like solitaire or chess to keep your mind sharp." She also suggest Yoga for mind and body health. I think jigsaw puzzles are fun and progressive.  They take a little longer to complete, but the end result can be a beautiful landscape photo along with a feeling of accomplishment--that makes anyone feel pretty good on a bad day. The idea is to get your mind involved in something that will not only improve your memory and sharpen your mind, but also, take your mind off anything that might me causing stress.

Laugh: Chris from ThatsFit! points us to a study that "examines the total body connection; an understanding that the mind, the body, and the spirit work in conjunction to regulate our psychophysiology."  It's seems clear to me--we all need to start laughing a whole lot more.  Read the Sunday comics, these can be sent to your inbox via email, find humor in life.    Improve your mood and reduce stress watching stand up comedy or funny movies.  Don't miss the opportunity to laugh.

Sleep: Need I say more!  We all want to sleep more, well why not get a cat nap during that scheduled relaxation time.  Colleen from 3DayMom says, "Just snoozing for 20 to 30 minutes can work wonders for a stressed out, tired old body."  She adds that "... you’ll feel better, you’ll have more energy, and your productivity in the afternoon will go through the roof."  I will have to agree with that, even though I am guilty of denying myself a nap in place of doing chores or catching up on emails, homework or other activity.  On days when I listen to my internal mechanism and let myself take a nap, I do feel better the rest of the day.  Granted, when I first get up from a nap I feel groggy, I just drink a tall glass of cold water, iced tea or hot tea and the groggy feelings are replaced by a superb energy.

Music:  I love listening to all types of music.  It can be therapeutic, calming, entertaining and energizing. Whether I'm listening to oldies, classic rock, country or Latin music--it all just boils down to me and my not-so-great singing voice.  In the end, a very happy heart evolves.

Time will pass, the chores will always be there, and the callers and emailers can leave a message.  Don't miss the opportunity to play, read, laugh, and sleep.  Now go play some mind games and stay sharp!

Stay Well,

"It does not matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop."--Confucius

Fitness, Nutrition, Relaxation - Week 2

Week two of Fitness, Nutrition, and Relaxation.  I hope you had a chance to 'push up', undress your salad and most important, found time to relax.  This week we will add to what we did last week with a lower body exercise, breakfast idea, and another R&R tip. 

Fitness

Squats:  These are what you do when you want to sit but you don't; when you hover, so to speak.  So grab a chair or a stool or a swiss ball to use as your guide or shall we say, as the guide to your gluteus maximus because that's what you'll be working, along with with your quads (thigh muscles), hamstrings, and calve muscles. 

Place your feet about hip width apart, toes and knees pointed forward or slightly outward, keep your abdominals tucked in, back is straight, arms can be either at your side or just hold them out in front for balance. 

Now squat down or guide your buttocks down towards the chair or stability ball, as if you were going to sit, hold that position for a second, then come back up pushing through the heels.  While you're down you will feel that most of the weight is on your heels, you could almost feel your toes lifting a bit.

Things to remember: Control your abdominals by pushing your belly button back (suck it in!)  Exhale on the way down, inhale on the way up. Keep your knees from going over your toes.  If you can't see your toes you need to adjust your position so that your knees are always behind your toes. 

How many?  Well, start with 8, 2-count, squats--that means that you go down for two counts and come back up for two counts.  Take a break, shake out your legs a bit and repeat.  Try going down on four counts and up four counts.  The slower you do them the harder they are.  Don't over do it or you'll be so sore you'll never do them again.

Muscles involved:  glutes, quads, hamstrings and calves---tight! tight! tight! That's the way we like them right?

Nutrition

Photo by framboise

This week I'm focusing on the most important meal of the day; breakfast.  The name says it all--to break the fast.  So why are so many people skipping breakfast?  I know of at least two reasons, lack of time and to loose weight. 

For some odd reason we seem to find time to give to everyone else but ourselves.  Aside from a fire or medical emergency, what can possibly keep you from eating something before leaving your house in the morning?  If you're running late consider a portable breakfast such as a fruit, protein bar, etc. If time is an issue I recommend getting up a wee bit earlier and making time to eat. 

As for those of you who think that starving your body equals weight loss, think again.  You are starving your body which in turn slows your metabolism and in the end you gain weight, yes, you gain.  Your body will know when starvation mode kicks in and it will hold on to every ounce of water, fat and calories you put into it. It's called self preservation!

Tom at  Free Fitness Tips has a series on boosting metabolism in which he shares this: "Just as eating large meals can hurt your metabolism, eating too few meals can have the same effect. To keep your metabolism high you need to feed it."  I agree with Tom and all other fitness and nutrition experts out there.  Does your car run better with less fuel?  Do you think eventually it will stop running?  Your body needs fuel and the fuel comes from nutritious foods.

An article at Ripped Corner has 7 great tips for a better breakfast.  Simply stated, balance your breakfast so that your early morning fuel is the best it can be to take you through the rest of the morning without feeling like you could eat a horse or your babie's PB&J.

Relaxation

Photo by Olivander

Last week I talked about finding time to relax.  That can be difficult when there are kids running in and out of the house or kids that never leave the house, work, chores and other responsibilities. Most of us try to run our lives minute by minute trying to remember everything we need to do and even the things we don't need to do, but want to. 

Now that you've figured out a way to fit in a few minutes for yourself, my next tip is to write things down.  I know, writing while driving is not a great idea so you may have to just turn the radio up and sing out loud therefore avoiding the possibility to retreat into any stressful thoughts. 

But when you're not busy driving, have a small notepad or a planner with a monthly calendar and notes section.  Keep it in your purse, bag, diaper bag, gym bag, the kitchen counter, your night stand..etc., you get the idea, keep it handy.  This is your mini journal where you'll write things you need to remember throughout the day when you're not ready to do them.  If you have some thoughts on any event from your day, write it down, you never know it may turn into a great novel some day.  It's OK to dream a little :-)

I keep a notebook in my kitchen which I use to write my to-do list, grocery list, books I'd like to read, etc.  Sometimes I remember a recipe or see a recipe on TV, I write it in my notebook so I don't forget to go back and look it up. 

Your family calendar is another great tool to have handy, either on the wall or on a desk.  Keep it up to date then you'll never have to try to remember when you have an appointment.  Set some reminders using the computer calendar, your cell phone or home phone.  Many phones have that feature--so why not use it.

I find that keeping a schedule of sorts will help to set the standard for the whole family.  Marilyn Etzel from HubPages writes the following: 

"With a schedule, you and your kids can appreciate that there is a time for everything, a time for going to school and work, a time to do school assignments and chores. Best of all, you can also have a definite a time to relax."

The idea is to keep your mind clear of cluttered so that you CAN relax.  So what are you waiting for, get to work!!

Stay well,

Fitness, Nutrition, Relaxation - Week 1

This week marks the first in my weekly series of The Fitness, Nutrition, and Relaxation program.  These lifestyle changing ideas can be either the beginning of your own plan or added to an already fantastic routine.  I will provide one exercise, one recipe or meal idea, and one relaxation technique.  Together we will begin to add each of these ideas together.  Over the weeks, as we continue to perfect each exercise, change the way we eat, and incorporate some well deserved R&R, we will begin to form habits that are likely to change the way we feel and the way we look.  Who knows, maybe your family will clue into what you’re doing and follow in your healthy living footsteps.

Fitness

Photo by Fanboy30

Get down and give me 20!!

When babies reach a certain age (somewhere between 4 and 8 months- depends on the child) the first physical activity they do is a push up.  Have you ever noticed?  It is the sweetest thing to see them trying to balance that big ol’ head and push up with their tiny little arms.  But they persist and eventually they go from belly to knees. 

Well we, as adults, need to mimic this determination and persistence that babies intuitively show off right from the start.  This week’s exercise is the infamous Push Up.  The push up is one of the most effective exercises because you have to engage many muscles just to hold the proper form.  Push ups test your cardiovascular and muscular endurance as well as your level of fitness. 

In an article on the New York Times, writer Tara Parker-Pope says, “The push-up is the ultimate barometer of fitness. It tests the whole body, engaging muscle groups in the arms, chest, abdomen, hips and legs. It requires the body to be taut like a plank with toes and palms on the floor. The act of lifting and lowering one’s entire weight is taxing even for the very fit.” 

Having been in the US Marines I know all too well the meaning behind ‘get down and give me 20,’ it was never really 20 because we had to do 4 count push ups so we were doing 40 at a time.  If you really want to challenge yourself, give it a shot… count down 1- up 2- down 3- up 4 – that’s your first push up.  Ouch!!!

However, one must first start at the beginning to avoid injury and work your way up to a full push up.  Zandria from Keep Up With Me, writes about graduating from commonly known “girly push ups” to “real” push ups.  “I had established a goal: I wanted to graduate from doing girly pushups on my knees, to being able to do real pushups from my toes. I’m happy to report that I have now accomplished this goal.” So set a goal, start with the “girly push up” and work your way up to real push ups.

Check out Krista at Stumptuous.com, who gives us girls a variety of forms from beginner to advanced, to help us get started.  Men, young adults, yes, you too can adapt these to your body.  The form is the same for everyone and you can start wherever you want depending on your level of fitness. “Some of you might want to start right at stage 1, while others can jump to stage 2 or even 3. Before you move to the next stage, ensure that you can perform the easier exercise with rigid body and a good range of motion.” Who knows, if you keep up the training you may eventually graduate to doing a push up with a monkey on your back, or a 40 lb kid, whichever is easiest. 

The best part of doing push ups:  no equipment or location required!  So what are you waiting for, get down and give me 20!  OK maybe not, but start today with as many as you can, then work your way up from there.

Nutrition

My lunch:  Romaine lettuce, baby spinach, yellow pepper, granny smith apple, craisins, walnuts, egg whites, part-skim mozzarella cheese, olive oil and lemon juice.

Because I love dressing and undressing salads, I will have to start with that meal.  Salads can get a bad reputation from people who tend to ‘over dress’ their salads resulting in no weight loss and even some weight gain.  In an article called Undress Your Salad! posted in the Wellness Junction, and written by yours truly, I describe ways you can make your salad fun, nutritious and delicious without the excess fat. 

The idea is to dress your salad with nutrient rich foods, vegetables, lots of colors, fruits and nuts.  If you feel you must have some kind of dressing, go for something less damaging than the creamy fatties such as Olive Oil and lemon juice or Balsamic Vinaigrette.  Be creative, after all, this is your meal and only you have to like it.   

For this week you are tasked with either adding a salad to an already nutritious meal or replacing a meal with a salad an awesome salad.  Try my lunch above or come up with your own combination and share it with the rest of the world.

Relaxation

Photo by szlea

Ahhhhhhh! Finally, a chance to breathe and engage in some serious self talk.   When I attempt to get a full night’s sleep my mind wonders for hours, inevitably the baby will wake up for no known reason and my 6 hours of sleep suddenly become 3 or 4 if I’m lucky.  My goal is to make the time to rest, nap, or simply relax in an environment that gives me the opportunity to be alone with my own thoughts (not my children’s).   

You don’t have to tell me how busy you are, I know, I have four kids ranging from 18 months to 17 years old—believe me, I’m busy and running (physically or mentally) most of the time.  But I have made it a point, even if it means going to the “grocery store” by myself, to carve out at least ½ hour just for me.

Lately the weather has been splendid so I have been going to one of my favorite places, my garden.  It’s my current hobby and one that my kids usually run away from so that’s actually a good time to be alone.  Jeff Archer at Instant Feel Good writes, “Hobbies are what we all have as kids but only some of us have them when we grow up. It is so good for your health and mind to have something you enjoy in your life as a regular fixture and know that in times of stress, you could escape to do it knowing it will get you back on track.”

Notice the operative word here is ‘escape’.  That’s exactly what I do when I step out back and start pulling weeds or covering up mole holes. Sounds like a lot of work but this is my way to escape from the kids, electronics, and other noise pollution we experience every day.  Sometimes I just say I’m going to pull weeds and if they bug me they will pull weeds too.  They usually withdraw into their rooms like rabbits hiding from their prey.  Instead I go out back and just sit and enjoy the weather. 

Get up a little earlier than the family and if you are having trouble mustering up some energy during the AM hours, read Kavit Haria's 5 things you can do each morning to have more energy on the Wellness Junction.  Kavit writes that "Energy is a source within us that we can increase or decrease not only using the mind, but based on how we utilize our food and drink." If you are a night owl go to bed a little bit later or go for a walk—10 minutes in any direction away from your house will turn into a 20 minute walk since you have to come back at some point.  That’s 20 minutes you didn’t think you had.  The idea is to carve out time just for you to relax, regroup, and get control of your day.

Now, go take a look at your calendar, reorganize what you must, and write it down—I will take time to relax today! I look forward to your comments and updates on how you incorporate these ideas into your daily routine! Don’t forget to share your own ideas with us!

Stay Well,