FamilyInShape

Could be overwhelming - refocus

Photo by me... out of focus flowers

Out of time. Out of energy. TIME TO REFOCUS!

The Kids. My School. My Job. The Big Move to Cuba! Our House! It's a lot to think about. It's a lot to plan without loosing my mind.

We have a big move coming up in about six weeks and I wish I could say that I can just sit here and wait until the day comes.  NOT SO! A lot has to be done in between and with hubby already gone, it's all on me, again!! (not feeling bitter at all).  Part of my service to our country, to make sure his family is moved smoothly from the comfort of our home to a foreign country, as long as he is not stressed and can do his job well, that's all that matters.  (If you feel a little sarcasm in my *voice* you got it right).  Truly, I'm sure he would rather be here helping us get ready but he's not so I must adapt, right?!

Over the next few weeks I have to de-crap my closets.  Isn't it amazing how much stuff we accumulate over the years.  We have never been stationed in one place more than two years, needless to say, the 'toss-keep-donate' process happens easily and with much, much less hassle. This time we were blessed and stayed here four years -- a long stretch for us.  However, I have more stuff to 'store-toss-donate-keep' because during out stay we added a baby and sent a child into the grown up world.  He had a lot of stuff crap in his room.  Amazing how much I had to throw away, mostly school stuff.

As I was reorganizing the closets and going through our clothes I realized that half of our clothes would be unsuitable for our new home..ya know... winter clothes in a tropical country, probably a good idea to let these sit in storage until we return to a place with more than one season.  Then there are the toys, kids clothes, shoes, old coats, baby items...wow.  By the way, if you hate to throw out the stuff you don't use you have a few options.  One, of course is your local thrift store.  Another option is www.freecycle.org.  I offered several items, left them on my driveway and later whomever wanted them came over and picked them up. How cool is that.  Recycling is the way to go.  I know another option is having a yard sale but to be honest, I hate hosting yard sales, I don't have the patience, it's a lot of work so if I have something worth selling I go for Craig's list, where I sold my Van by the way or eBay.

So finding the time and energy to clean up the house and get it ready for the packers, write my papers for school, get the kids where they need to be on time and still manage to laugh has been a bit of a challenge these days.

Well, a few things help me stay focused regardless of how tired I am or what chores need to get done:

I am keeping my date at the gym constant - it is my place to find sanity and the one thing I can control. I have also added a 2 -3 mile walk at night with one of my neighbors, Maria.  We have a chance to talk without kid interruptions and I have a chance to clear my head.

I am going to bed at a reasonable time so that I can be well rested to take on the next day.  It's not all that uncommon for me to stay up late and get up super early just so I can catch up, but in the end, I end up so tired that I get less done.  So I'm working on 7 hours of sleep being my norm, not four or five.

I am being careful about what I eat and when because I already know that when I'm stressed I could easily breakdown the walls and go for whatever I'm craving - that could be really ugly.  So I just don't buy the stuff I know I'll crave and stick with my healthy foods.  It's easier to avoid my potential stress related train wreck with food.

Last, but not least, keeping up with my to-do list and calendar.  They are my compass right now.  I like the idea that I don't have to store anything in my head or try to remember if or when I did something. Just write it down and set a little electronic reminder, done!!

I'm committed to stay motivated and treat myself well because if my (mental, physical, spiritual) health fails I can't take care of my precious little people.

Stay Well,

He's leaving the nest

While I can't even begin to describe how happy I am that my first born is now an "adult" and on his way to college I have to say that my heart is aching.  I've been fine until now, or so I thought.  I tell myself I wont cry when I drive away because after all "he's hardly ever home" and sometimes "he gets on my nerves" but no.  That's not the case.  I am aching right now at the idea that I have to let him go.

My first born, Josh, is a musician.  I never knew, no one really knew this about him.  What we saw develop was a kid in love with words and their origin, in love with reading great books, solving interesting puzzles, and being good at whatever he did.  He was great in Math and he knew it so, of course, as he grew we (dad and I) figured he would follow dad and go into engineering, computers, maybe even teaching the subject.  But his love for literature used to make us think that maybe he would take that route, once he even started writing a book, quite good but something happened that really threw us for a loop.  He joined the school choir - easy class and everyone has to do it at some point or another. 

I remember teacher's used to tell me he had great form, he was very focused, he was good.  As a parent I thought "well thank you, that's my boy" as my heart filled with pride.  Then one day, a few grades later, he sang a solo.  He was the only boy in a choir group of 22 kids.  Apparently the other boys were not interested in being singled out.  He stuck with it and it paid off.  I was a nervous wreck so I set up the camera knowing I would miss something.  At this moment I had never heard him sing alone.  NEVER.  He started singing Josh Groban's "You Raise Me Up" and I almost fainted.  I had no clue he could sing that well.

Still I never thought he would follow that field as a career.  In fact, he didn't think he was that good and said "Mom, it was just a song," relax.  OK whatever.  I know what I heard from a kid without professional training, but he was right.  After all, I am his mom and will be proud of everything and anything my kids do.  That was 8th grade.  In 9th grade he auditioned for the choir in his new school and his new Choir Director approached me and said "this child needs voice coaching, here, call this lady."  That's all he said. First I thought, "how much is this going to cost me?" Yes, as a parent of four kids I have to think about costs of things.  So I called the lady, Ms. Mary is her name.  She first gave me her resume and told me about the quality of people she trains and how she only selects kids with true talent.  She also mentioned that every kid she ever trained was able to get a scholarship if they applied themselves in every way.  She followed that with this, "however, I do not take Freshmen"  but that if I wanted she would allow him to audition just so he could see where he was and what he needed to do next.  So then I thought OK, I can do that. 

He auditioned.  She called me and said "how about he comes in every other Monday at 4:30 pm?" Excuse me?  What's going on? I though you didn't take Freshmen.  "I don't, but he's talented, he's going places and I want to be his coach."  OK.  Let's do it.  That was the beginning of a beautiful friendship and a bright future for my kid.  Fast forward 4 years during which time he was coached privately by Ms. Mary first twice a month then every week and sometimes twice a week; coached also by his Choir Director Mr. JD.  These four years he spent learning to play the piano, learning to read and write music, learning to conduct a choir and learning to sing in different languages, classical music, theater, Gospel, a capella, duets, participating in solo and choir competitions most of which he/they won something. 

All his teachers were a great influence in his life.  I thank them for seeing what we couldn't at home. His efforts and dedication to this field payed off and all those who told me he would go places were right.  He recently received several grants and scholarships which will pave the way to his future career as a Musician.  He will be attending Westminster Choir College at Rider University in New Jersey.  Here he will study Music Education and Vocal Performance.  Here he will continue to grow, mature and become exactly what he wants to become.

My heart aches and I can't wait to get past this week because I already know it will be hard to leave him.  I have three other kids to focus on, I have a big move coming up in 4 weeks, I have a lot going on right now.  I will let myself cry because there is nothing wrong with "feeling" and showing how I feel.  I am not speeding away from the parking lot, I am going to look back, I am going to be sad.  On the bright side, that sadness will be temporary because my sole purpose is ensure his happiness, safety, and well being.  I am very happy, excited, proud of his accomplishments so far.  So much more to come.

I will miss my Josh.

Consistency is key for long term fitness

Over the last, oh I don't know, eons, I have tried every diet, fitness routine, quick fix pills and several equipments, and even several diet products that promise to make me skinny in no time flat. Some worked short term then I had to get back to reality, others just didn't work at all and for sure I figured it was the crappy product or diet plan I was on.  It couldn't be me right? 

I have become a little bit smarter about all the dieting and quick fix programs and their false promises - basically I don't believe in strict diets nor do I believe that diet pills or quick-fix equipment work, at all.  OK maybe some of you might have lost some weight or lots of weight taking an over the counter or prescription pill but go ahead and stop taking that pill and see how long the weight stays off.  Strict diets only work if you do them consistently for the rest of your life.

I learned, the hard way, that the #1 key to success is consistency.  Once you have a plan that includes eating healthy and exercising then all you have to do is follow through and keep doing what you planned to do.  The best laid plans are nothing if we don't follow through.  

So buying a journal, a gym membership, cute workout clothes and new running shoes and paying a trainer will not increase your ability to lose weight or get in shape or even improve your health if you don't use them.  You still have to watch what you eat (and I don't mean watch it go in your mouth, I mean be aware of what's good and bad in what you eat each every meal).  The gym membership is just a waste of money if you don't actually go to the gym; cute workout clothes and new shoes are pointless if you don't ever break a sweat in them.  Go ahead, make them stinky - that is the smell of a hard workout. The Personal Trainer still gets paid regardless of your progress - he/she is there to lead you, teach you, motivate you and guide you - but you have to want it more than the trainer.  Show up, work hard!

I'm sure, in fact, I know I have not reached the MY personal fitness goals. Not for lack of motivation, know-how, or consistency but simply because I set goals for the long term and I know that it can take as long to get there as it did to get where I am now.  Funny how my body just didn't bounce back after baby number 3 and 4.  What was I thinking?  Regardless of the changes in my body as I age, umm  get wiser, I can't give up and blame it all on my "maturity," in fact, I work harder because it takes longer to achieve the same results.  Add to that the added stress of raising kids, added stress of packing out and moving every 2-4 years due to military orders, school, work, etc..etc. 

With a well laid out plan and taking into consideration holidays, kids getting sick, family visiting, etc. What can possibly keep me from getting a workout in today?  Well, first my attitude can get in the way of things.  If I get up looking for an excuse not to go to the gym or for a bike ride or a walk then, believe me, I will find a way and a reason why I can't exercise today.  Secondly, preparation.  If I don't lay out my clothes, pack my gym bag, fill my water bottle AND write on my calendar what my next day will be, it's very likely that it will be filled with a lot of things, none of which include my fitness routine. 

To avoid these potential interruptions in my fitness routine I first fix my attitude, before I even get to bed.  I write down what class I'm taking or how far I plan to walk/run/ride, etc.  When all else fails, I call someone and tell them what I'm doing. Now there's one more person I'm accountable to.  Second, I plan to succeed the next day by preparing everything the night before - gym bag, food, water bottle, clothes, etc. 

OK so I have control of these two issues in my life.  I can fix that.  But what about the others, the unexpected or even expected events that come up. I have those days.  Believe me, with four kids and a husband whose not always here, the last minute cold, tummy issue, and food spill rests on me to clean up.  No matter how great a plan I had to go to the gym at 9:30 am, things happen.  

It's OK to stop and do what needs to be done. Deal with the situation and move on.  I can't beat myself up about it, I can't beat my kids up either -- that would be counter productive. So I have to go to plan B.  We all should have one.  Options:  Once all the clean up is done and the child is settled or asleep, workout at home, use FitTV, ExerciseTV, YouTube, and the million and one blogs out there with easy, no equipment required fitness programs that can be done at home in a short period of time.  In fact I have a few of those myself.  Checkout the links below.  The idea is to keep moving, do something, don't just give up for the day and call it quits.

The last minute visitors...they have a place in my healthy heart too. Either come with me to the gym or wait here, I'll be back shortly.  Many of my friends already know to show up prepared, just in case we go for a long walk or in case we go to a Spinning Class.  When I have overnight visitors coming and I know they're coming I tell them in advanced that I plan to go to the gym and I would love for them to come along.  But if they don't want to, that's OK.  Mi casa es tu casa...be back shortly.  I know there are times when you have company coming and you have to prepare, clean, cook, etc.... that's different, but not so.  This is a great opportunity to get the workout in around that particular visit - very early or late on the day of, or the day before or after.  No one ever said we had to be working freakishly hard 7 days a week.  But we can certainly plan to exercise and eat healthy before a party.

It is not difficult to be consistent with matters of the heart and health.  We can consistently find time to do a great deal of things in our every day life, except taking care of #1- that usually goes to the bottom of the list.  Maybe it's time we reset our priorities and put YOU back on the list as #1, permanently.

Here's a tasty, easy, breakfast recipe - try it, hope you like it!

Egg white & Salsa Wrap

1/2 cup egg whites

2 TBS Salsa

1 TBS Mild Cheddar or Colby Jack Cheese

1 Small wheat flour tortilla

Cook egg whites

Add Cheese and Salsa

Scoop it into the tortilla, wrap it and eat it!!  

It's delicious.

Stay Well,

Relevant Links:

Are you Stuck: Here's a quick fat-burning workout

Staying focused when kids are sick

Cool sites you should visit:

LoveEshe - Exercise advise, nutrition tips and tough love!

The Jungle of Life - Traveling through the jungle we call life- one step at a time.

Create a Balance - A life balance personal development blog to help you embrace your authentic self.

Re-evaluating fitness and setting goals

Photo credit Tizzalicious

(cross posted at BlogHer)

I think everyone can agree that we all get in a workout rut every once in a while. I realized that I'm there and that I've been doing is just not giving me the results I want. I think I'm doing plenty, but it is obviously not the quantity of my workouts that's holding me back but the quality and so I need to make some changes. For a little while there I used my Little Bear as my excuse, "I have some baby fat to burn off, but he's only six months old, I have time" I recall telling myself. It is a really bad idea to even START using the pregnancy and the birth of a baby as a crutch or as a reason why we hold on to excess body fat. Soon the child is getting ready to graduate High School and we're still claiming baby fat. Well, Little Bear is now 2.5 years old and the oldest is 18 with a 15 and a 6 year old in between. Luckily, I kept off most of whatever I gained during pregnancy. My focus is now on losing body fat and trimming down the inches and not so much on the number on that cranky scale. I'm not a good friend of the scale so I will stick with a tape measure instead.

My fitness routine on most weeks includes Boot Camp, Muscle Conditioning, Spinning®, Turbo Kickboxing, and Pilates. I say most weeks because when I don't teach or train someone I CHOOSE to stay home and catch up on my chores, homework, sleep, etc… And there it is, the culprit and the reason I'm not getting results. Did you catch the operative words—MOST WEEKS. I have to commit to go workout on days when I don't have to teach, regardless of what else needs to be done at home. Chances are the chores will still be there waiting. Besides, if I had to teach or meet a client I would have to go, right? Right!!

My other issues are that I sometimes go off track with my eating habits, I stay up late and get up early, and lately, I have not been writing anything down as I should. Did I mention stress? I have a few things that add unnecessary stress to my life. Let's see now, we are a military family expecting orders to move mid-school year – no, not crazy about that; we have a house to sell; I'm taking classes online (what was I thinking?); our oldest is going AWAY to college and did I mention we have a 15 year old girl? Yikes! What happened to my little girl? It can all be handled, I just have to get organized, re-evaluate and set some realistic goals. Here are some things I know I need to do:

1. WRITE IT DOWN! A goal has to be on a paper, on the calendar, journal, or on the fridge door. Once it's written down I am accountable and more likely to stick with it.
2. It is important to set realistic goals. In other words, I can't just write that I want to lose 15 pounds by next Friday and expect it to happen, at least not following a healthy routine. I am willing to trim down at a much slower pace because I want it to stay off. I also don't want to lose muscle mass just body fat and inches.
3. I will be prepared to succeed every day. This means, don't leave home without my water and healthy snacks such as a fruit, protein bar, nuts, etc. I will pack my gym bag and have my workout clothes ready every day. Sometimes I wait to the last minute (procrastinate) then I end up stressing if I can't find my shorts or my shoes.
4. Use my calendar to keep track of what I am doing to reach my goal – sleep, nutrition, exercise, relaxation, etc.
5. Re-visit the fridge, freezer and pantry. There are some pesky snacks left over from a party that need to go. I must eliminate the temptation and replace them with healthy snacks—again!

This is my week to evaluate my fitness, nutrition, stress, and sleep. To reach my goals I have to get them down on paper, give myself the time it takes to get there, eliminate some of the stressors in my life, and get some well-needed sleep. I'm excited and energized by seeing my plan on paper or on screen in this case. I hope this list will give you a boost to get started on your goals as well, try mine or tell me about yours…I'd like to know what you are doing or plan to do to reach your fitness goals.

Stay well,

Revisiting my fitness routine

Women on Bicycles --- Image by © John Springer Collection/CORBIS

I recently started swimming, although I have not been as comitted to that activity as I would like to be, I have made great improvements in my endurance and form.  Aside from that huge change I basically teach my regular classes; Spinning, Muscle Conditioning, Senior Strength and Intro to Pilates.  The rest of the time I, somehow, find something more important to do at home and "I could always get a workout in later."  Ha! Yeah right!  Who am I kidding, when I'm done cleaning my bathroom I'm going to either take a nap or sit and relax, read, write, whatever, anything not requiring physical activity.

I decided to begin training myself outside of training anyone else.  I realize that the work I put forth in a class or during a training session is mostly adrenalin.  I needed to be challenged by others the same way I challenge those in my class. I find it amazing how I can push hard and work hard when I'm teaching but when I'm the student I feel the urge to quit every once in a while--I don't quit but I sometimes want to!  My teaching partners say the same thing so I know I'm not alone in this.

Anyway, I started taking a class called Total Body Conditioning (TBC) which is like boot camp training and it was then that I saw myself in the sand pitt with my old Marine Corps Drill Instructor at my heels making me do push-ups, mountain climbers, jacks, back to push ups, crunches, back to push ups....oh the nightmare.  This type of cross training is energizing, motivating, invigorating and super hard.  My first day, last Tuesday, was the toughest for me because there were other instructors in the class who are there regularly and expected me to keep up with them, which I did (barely).

I have been sore ever since.  My core muscles are screaming, every time I laugh, cough, sneeze, stand, sit, walk...I can feel everything, everywhere--oh what a feeling.  AND try teaching a class without showing the pain, oh yes, it's a challenge but I have to say, I feel fantastic.

Sometimes we get into our little workout routines and we're just happy to be in a routine at all so we stick with it and go about our business without taking into consideration how we might feel in a month or six weeks from now.  It is so important to switch workouts around from one week to the next and sometimes from day to day to ensure that we are working all the muscles and that we don't get bored with the same old routine.  When one activity becomes boring then we are not being challenged and there really is no point in doing it so we either make it more challenging by adding resistance or distance or we find something else that accomplishes the same goal.

I would strongly suggest to those of you who feel you are stuck in a rut, find a class or an activity that will keep you challanged, motivated and make you work hard.  One that will challenge your strength, cardiovascular endurance AND your mind!  Go for it!